Must read webstuff.
I stumbled upon 2 articles today that I think are must reads.
Furthermore, I think that if you read them, you will have a better foundation to begin understanding me. Maybe even yourself too, at some point.
Anyway...
How to think: Habits of Happy People
I dont really think about this on a conscious basis. But reading this article made me realize - I do all of that stuff. Daily, as part of being me.
Maybe I dont actively call people with my phone - but I usually spend at least a few hours out of the day just shooting the bull with people. And for sure, I will chit chat with about anyone. About anything.
Expressing gratitude is very important to me. Some people might not always realize it, because a fair portion of what I do is silent gratitude. Im not afraid to say Thank You. Not even 3 times in 5 minutes. Im not afraid to take some extra time to show someone I care. Or that they did something to me I appreciate. I know I would feel warm and fuzzy if someone did the same for me - especially with more than just words.
Random kindness is the best. Im always looking for ways to just inject some kindness into people's day. Whether it be making them laugh or smile. Or maybe telling them how great they are. Or that they just said something phenomenal. Or other things - like talking to the homeless guy, or giving away extra food. Or holding the door for someone. I dunno - its so easy to be kind, if you are not caught up in yourself.
Obviously, this blog is testament to the sheer volume of stuff I write down about my life. Good bad and fluxxing. Yes, I reappraise my life all the time. Its a very important thing to do, in my opinion. I think this prevents stagnation. And dulling that comes with age. Fresh and new and constantly reinventing parts of my life. Yup - its good.
And yes, whenever I must be a pessimist - I am proactive about it. Im fiesty and looking for change in the things that I am not happy with. And Im probably challenging you to change the things you are not happy with too. Sometimes it comes across as combative, but so what.
I look at it mostly like this - Do your best to either accept it, or change it.
Also, The Power of Gratitude.
Oddly enough, I believe I also subscribe to a lot of what is being said in this article. Naturally.
In general, I think a lot of people stop at a simple Thank You. While sometimes, this is sufficient ... I do not think it completely conveys the message. Nor does it consistently tap into the power of gratitude.
This is probably one of the underlying factors as to how a good relationship to me, feels like a competition. To show how much you care for the other person. To make them feel loved, completely.
Its gratitude. Its thinking, planning, saying, doing all the things that show just how thankful you are towards this person. For them being in your life. For them doing whatever it is that they do. For them being them.
And I think its a tragedy that this often happens way too late.
Funny thing is this.
Most of this stuff is trivial to incorporate into your life. TRIVIAL. At first it takes some conscious effort (as does any kind of change), but after a while, its just habit. Think about anything you have changed in your life, and you will see this as a commonality.
Its amazing to me, how far civilization has progressed in terms of technology and things to make our lives better. Yet somehow ... everyone seems to feel like they have no time. Why is that?
Probably because we are spending our time inefficiently. Because everything is easier to do, more accessible, we want to do more. But what we should want to do ...
Is more of the things that truly matter.
And be Happy :)
Comments
I also have that thing where I will talk to ANYone, ANYwhere, ANYtime, about ANYthing. I know it bugs the heck out of some people but such a ridiculous amount of good has come from it - advice, recommendations, connecting people, etc - that I know I'm on to something good. At least for my life.
Not sure I understand which route you are going here. Clarify?
Are you saying it seems trivial to do, but is not?
Or the small acts appear as trivialities, and thus arent worth doing?
First one... many people think they are trivial but, in fact, they are not.
Just a couple days ago, I came across a card I saved from when a friend suprised me with a rose for no particular reason (the card reads "a perfect rose for a perfect friend")... and I almost cried all over again.
I disagree. Being kind to others is a trivially easy task. Doing random nice things, trivially easy task. Expressing gratitude, trivially easy task.
I say these are all trivially easy, because most of the time, you can accomplish any single small-scale version of these actions in *less than 5 minutes*. Its odd in fact ... that there are a plethora of things that you can accomplish in 5 minutes or less, that have *huge* lasting impact on other people.
I used to have a similar discussion with a woman I was living with. In my opinion, it was trivial for her to call me up and say "Hey, running late. I am not sure when I am getting home yet, but I am okay." That takes all of 2 minutes tops. But the act of not doing it, caused hours of problems.
Simple things really can go a long way. So the end result isnt *trivial* at all. But the act of doing so ... trivial in its easiness.
Again, I think people are just getting much worse with their time management skills. All of this stuff used to be fairly easy. Even before we were ultra-connected through the internet.