and I only had to hang up on tech support in India once (a record for me!).
turns out that all i needed was my IP address. i eventually figured out how to hit the modem to see it (gee - just like hitting the router, but you have to be plugged in to the modem).
for future reference, the key to everything is
192.168.1.1
of course, if I can't get into the internet, I'll never be able to find that. So I used my label maker to put all the vital info on the router itself.
I hope I have at least another 2 years before I go through this again.
Fuckity FUCK. I just tried to post and upload a video. I got the following existential error message from Vox:
"Sadly, your search couldn’t be completed. You could try again, but it still might not work. The world is a very unpredictable place. For this, we are truly sorry."That sounds very, um, Protestant.
Not for me. For my sister-in-law who just adopted a wee one a few weeks ago. They're out visiting from Michigan so her mom is throwing her a shower. I've been in charge of the games and I'm picking up cake and balloons.
Caleb is adorable. It makes me excited to think that in just 7 more months we'll have a new wee one of our own. It also scares the hell outta me...the 24/7 attention that they need. Where in the hell will I find 24 hours a day? I barely have an hour now to take a shower and pee in the morning and then I'm going till I pass out on the couch. It's all pretty overwhelming but I'm enjoying the little dude and then will develop a plan once all the chaos of having family in town brings is over.
Speaking of showers...I actually came home from work, took a long shower, picked out clothes (rather than fumbled in the dark for them), and did my make up and jewelry. It has been MONTHS since I've worn jewelry. I need to spend more time on myself but how? Again, where does this mysterious extra time come from?
Sigh.
I could use a snack and a nap. This getting pretty thing is rough. LOL
http://www.ingenio.com/details/Mark-Sichel/Other/5148124
Sweet Jesus. Enuff said.
I've been practicing for over twenty years and am experienced with
almost every kind of problem. I have no difficulty figuring out what
you need to do and telling you how to do it....whether it's a problem
with your mate or your spirit, nerves, or trauma, let's get to work and
get YOU feeling better fast. I really should be kept away from websites that automatically store my debit card information and shipping address, because last night in my vicoden/pain induced haze, I managed to buy some cute shoes from 6pm.com as well as some makeup from Avon. Oopsies!
Oh yeah it was from the dentist yesterday. The pain is not from the cavity I got filled, its from the 6 Needles they had to use multiple times to get me numb, which took OVER AN HOUR. Just for the lower right side of my jaw. It's not them, its totally me, but that sucked. I could barely open my mouth today to talk, let alone eat...
I managed to make it to work today, however the pain was too much. I was woken up multiple times throughout the night kept switching between the heating pad and a cold pack on my face, and at some point spilled a bottle of water in the bed so I had to avoid sleeping in a wet spot.. and yes, I'm sure it was water.
So I did the 2 important things at work, scanned the checks, and got all 5 offices to do their "batching" by 9:45 am. Usually it takes them until 2 or 3 pm. I was like HOLY SHIT. I told them it NEEDED to be done ASAP because I wasnt staying all day and no one else there knows how to do it, and they actually listened, ill just have to tell them EVERY day that Im leaving early LoL.
I shoulda came home and slept, but instead I took a vicoden and ran some errands, went to King Soopers, PetCo (i really dont like their new set up and they dont have things i really want to buy) then Kohls, which was very annoying and reminds me I was going to write an email complaint... but I managed to buy some black loafers for work for only $8, then to another King Soopers, and PetSmart to get what I really needed.
Got caught up on DWTS, SO sad that Aaron went home he was so good! Got my nails done this evening, while i was there it started snowing. Supposed to snow all weekend I guess. I cant tell if it has stopped for right now though.
Picked up a pumpkin spice latte from 7-11 on the way home in hopes of giving me some energy to finish cleaning up the house tonight since I work at Macy's all weekend. Oh Joy! LoL, Will hopefully be hitting up Bingo at TGIFridays tomorrow night, *crossing my fingers* that I win SOMETHING, anything!
A neighbor found a kitten in her woodpile, another neighbor thought it might be my cat and got me. Of course it was not mine, but I got to find out what one does here when one finds a cat. AND I got to meet a neighbor who is MY AGE! Nancy, who found the cat is awesome and 55. She and I hit it off. She like me finds animals and helps them to find new owners.
I took the cat to my sis's animal clinic and they checked it out, fed it, gave it shots and tests and have it under observation for the weekend. On monday I'll "drop in" and see if I want this new little girl cat or if I feel she should go to another family. (likely)
There, I snagged Beanie, Barb's dog for a playday with Nym. Beanie and Nym played ALL day and into the night.
My sis and Mark came to dinner and I finally got to cook for them. Mexican was the theme including intense margarita's. We all plan on going for a motorcycle ride tomorrow!
I found the "STATE" store and stocked up on liquor. :-)
It's all good. It really is.
|
My social worker 'spidey' senses tingling, heart sinking, I began reading.
The Reader's Digest version of the article is, writer, Julie Myerson is accused of writing about her children, thusly denying them both respect and privacy. She is accused of betraying love, intimacy and motherhood by various rabidly angry critics and Mark Sichel, rather than taking a more objective, principled high road, throws a few more sticks on Myerson's pyre in the town square. He states that Ms Myerson, "resigned from her job as Jake’s mother", after asking her 17 year old son to leave the family home for his drug abuse and chaotic behavior. A strategy known to many parents as "tough love".
Mr Sichel might have chosen to explore the historical context of tough love, and how various people have experienced this parenting strategy as both powerfully positive and also horribly horrific. He may have wanted to look at the sorts of advice parents are given from family, friends and so called 'experts' about how to manage an 'out of control child'. He might have looked at how very often the responsibility to manage these 'out of control' children resides with the mother. He may have chosen to look at the social constructions of motherhood, mother blame and 'good enough' parenting as presented by psychologist Donald Winnicott. He may have wanted to acknowledge that Myerson is hooped either way she fights the fight: Allow her son to remain in the family home, exposing the larger family to the chaos of a drug abusing teen - or ask him to leave ... either way, she will be criticized as a mother, as a woman.
Sichel criticizes Myserson's decision as an abdication of parenthood and frames it in the context of Myerson's estrangement from her own father. There is a suggestion here that Myserson has somehow failed to 'learn the lesson' inherent in her own experience of parental estrangement . Sichel however, does not go on to explore the very frequent pattern of inter-generational family estrangement, or to consider how Myserson may have been profoundly shaped by her experiences. There is little of compassion in Sichel's criticisms of Myerson, a quality I consider as primary and central to the family estrangement discourse.
Sichel points out that Myerson may have used her son's period of abstinence 'as a stepping-stone to repairing the rift
between Jake and his family' and seems to freeze this possibility as a one off opportunity, now missed - due to the fact Myerson broke the Golden Rule, Thou Shalt Not Write About Thy Children. It should be said that even after a fairly vigorous search for this literary 'rule' I have seen no evidence of it. The world is full of books, blogs, magazine articles of people writing about their kids. It is not until we see mothers, speaking of their experiences of parenting in less than glowing terms, that the 'mommy police' come out of the woodwork. [see my recent post, Bad Mommy]. Had Sichel included even a brief mention of this phenomena, I'd have been appeased. But no.
"Julie chose to publicly expose her child’s drug problems and the related behavioral problems caused by the drug abuse. Now that, in my opinion, is off limits, indecent and obscene." So says Sichel. "Any parent with respect for their child and human decency, love and kindness would not be critical of their child in their writing and publicly humiliate them for their own glorification as a writer." Suddenly Myerson is without decency, love or kindness and has behaved 'obscenely'. There is no room given for Myerson to write about her obviously very difficult experiences as a parent, no question about the truth of her experiences having equal validity, no room for Myerson to be central to her own story.
In Sichel's opinion, "Julie Myerson, however, made two indefensible moves: she not only publicly defamed her son but she never, at least in public, reflected on her role in her son’s problem." Is it defamation to speak truthfully, openly, passionately about how Myserson as a mother was impacted and influenced by her child's behavior? I say no, no it is not. I have read excerpts from Myerson's book, 'The Lost Child: a True Story' and no offense to her, she is perhaps more literary than some, but it's nothing that I haven't read in numerous places (books, blogs, articles) from other parents and mothers who have parented through a teen's crisis. I would argue that Myerson's choice to write at all about her children may be viewed as an effort to make sense of her experiences as a mother, and is nothing if not a reflection of her role in her son's difficulties and broader life.
All this leaves me wondering what is it about Myerson that brought the "mommy police' out in all their rampant glory? As I ask that question, I am quite cognizant that it doesn't have to be much, luck of the draw, wrong place, wrong time, one 'hostile bystander'. Why Myerson, remains however a valid question.
I'd like to see Julie Myerson's choices as a writer considered both from a place of gendered analysis and also framed in context to larger research about family estrangement. Hell, I'd like to see Julie Myerson's choices as a mother considered from the same places. I dare say the article would read considerably different from that of Mark Sichel, a publicly acclaimed psychologist and an "expert" in family estrangement.
I am so very grateful that I did not find my way to Mr Sichel's office to address my family estrangement issues. Shame on you Mark Sichel.
She knows the heaterboard is right underneath the tv. Maximum heat absorption
Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry®
- 21:27 I have to say, me, purchasing baby stuff, even for someone else, is a little weird feeling, but its for some one i ♥ so its okay! #
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